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Marquette Obliterates UW-Madison, 1-0, In Men's Soccer.

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This was the best soccer picture I could find on short notice.  My apologies.
This was the best soccer picture I could find on short notice. My apologies.

I know this blog focuses primarily on Marquette's men's basketball team, because (1) it's the most visible of all the Marquette sports teams, and (2) we're lazy, and (3) Joe Fulce is our friend on Twitter, but I just checked the Anonymous Eagle charter and there's nothing that prohibits me from writing about other sports. More importantly, I feel compelled to write something whenever one of our Golden Eagle teams does battle with the Red Menace of Madison.

Last night, YOUR Golden Eagle footballers took to the pitch (SOCCER TERM!) against the hated Taxidea taxus (taxi?) of UW-Madison. I'm told that Madison has dominated this series recently; the Golden Eagles hadn't notched a win against the rodents in the last ten contests. But that didn't deter Coach Louis Bennett and crew, who destroyed the Badgers, 1-0, in yesterday's match-up at Valley Fields. Midfielder Callum Mallace -- who should be pursuing a career as a secret agent with a kick-ass last name like that -- put home the game's lone goal on a set piece (SOCCER TERM!) in the 37th minute.

The Eagles rolled from there, as the Badgers -- in a nod to the slowdown, boring-as-hell pace employed by the Madison men's basketball team -- only managed six shots during the match. MU keeper David Check wasn't lulled to sleep by Madison's tactics, though, and recorded his fourth clean sheet (SOCCER TERM!) of the year.

Friend of the Show and MU Assistant Coach Stan Anderson sez that the Golden Eagles take on the undefeated UCONN Huskies -- who are averaging a staggering three goals per contest -- at 7:05 p.m. on Friday at Valley Fields. Field trip, anyone?