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4.4 Morning Coffee: Get Off My Lawn Edition

Wait, when did we become a rasslin' website? Oh, that's right -- it's the offseason. I stopped watching WWF when I was 12, when is was still called WWF. This current stuff is like the current crop of 'country' music: it's a bastardization of what made country music good. Waylon Jennings could poop better songs than Rascal Flatts. Mad Dog Vachon would destroy that John Cena p*ssy.

Also, it's Brewers Opening Day. No way in hell I'm going. It's freaking amateur hour. Just a bunch of obnoxious drunks. Now seriously kids, get off my lawn.

This Meatloaf meltdown is amazing.

The best Mizzou could do was Frank Haith?

Oregon's hideous floor has its first victim.

Worst. Tattoo. Ever.

Zooey Deschanel and Winnie the Pooh.

Wow.

Friday never sounded better.

John Calipari has taken at least $600 out my pocket the past couple of years. If he beats UConn, my wife wins $300. Nope. Not happenin'. A couple years back, I had $300 all but wrapped up until his Memphis team was unable to make free throws. Never again, Mr. Calipari. You're taking food out of the mouth of my daughter.

Butler-UConn tonight. Who ya got?

Marquette Basketball Links:
We debated if this was the best season since '03. Rubie lost the debate.
Calhoun should pull an Al and leave on top.
Jimmy Butler hopefully helped his NBA draft stock.
VCU's Skeen almost picked Marquette.
Tex Winter getting some Hall of Fame love.
How to beat UConn.

Random Music Video: Waylon Jennings