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Adjective SURVIVOR! Introducing Crotchety Tim Higgins

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After a yearlong journey, we've finally finished the Wonder Twins edition of Adjective Survivor, and Drunken Hobbit Jim Burr's hetero life partner, Tim Higgins, has an adjective all his own at long last:

Let me be first to welcome Crotchety Tim Higgins to Anonymous Eagle. Unfortunately for both of us, I think we'll be seeing a lot of each other as the years go by.

UPDATE! No, we won't: Tim Higgins is retiring.

And so ends Season Two Point Five of Adjective Survivor, which the critics universally panned as the worst season yet. (One reviewer simply wrote two words to describe the Wonder Twins edition: "Shit sandwich.") We've heard your message loud and clear, kids: y'all are sick of assigning adjectives to referees. In Season 3, it's time to inject some desperately-overdue life into this once-proud franchise.

Next week, we pull out the big guns.