Three years ago, I wrote what I thought was an amusing Badger Hate Week post titled "Behind The Music: The Boys Of Sigma Alpha Epsilon." It was a (mostly not true) parody piece focused of the absurdity of Wisconsin fans claiming "ownership" of the House of Pain classic, "Jump Around." It went over better than I expected, and always gets big page views when it gets retweeted as part of Classic Badger Hate Week.
The concept is pretty simple, really: "Jump Around" is 1) an incredibly famous song, and 2) used by nearly every sporting arena in the country (if not the world) as a pump up song during time outs. It's insane to think that Badger fans actually think they have some kind of ownership over the song for that purpose, and it's even nuttier when opinions like "leave it to the professionals in Madison" come from supposed journalists like Tom Oates.
Anyway, we all had a good laugh at Wisconsin's expense, and we all moved on with our lives, because, really, it's just a song that's played during time outs and no one *really* cares, right?
We find ourselves in 2014, and the Wisconsin faithful have turned into zealots.
EXHIBIT A: Approximately one year after I wrote the Behind The Music post, Sports Illustrated held a tournament for the best college football traditions. In a system determined by voting on the internet (so the potential for tomfoolery is high), "Jump Around" at Camp Randall Stadium won.
I mean, what. Here's the list of traditions that it beat out:
- Ohio State's sousaphone player dotting the "i" in Ohio
- Singing "Rocky Top" at Tennessee games.
- Chief Osceola and his flaming spear at Florida State
- Singing "Take Me Home Country Roads" at West Virginia
- Notre Dame players tapping the "Play Like A Champion Today" sign
- Ralphie the Buffalo running around the field at Colorado
- Texas A&M's "12th Man" traditions
- The Florida Gator Chomp
The mind boggles at the concept of anyone thinking that Wisconsin's pre-fourth quarter music selection beats ANY of those, and that's not even the full list.
This travesty was compounded this past summer, when "Jump Around" won yet another traditions online voting tournament, this time run by Sirius XM. The Badger tradition defeated dotting the "i" in Ohio by a scant 801 votes. Here's what "Jump Around" beat out head-to-head in the 32 item tournament:
- The War Eagles of Auburn
- LSU's Mike The Tiger
- FSU's Chief Osceola
- Arkansas' Calling of the Hogs
For me, live animals beat out House Of Pain every single time. As for the last one, which is just a chant, I'll give the nod to Arkansas over Wisconsin because Bret Bielema seems like a fun guy to hang out with.
THEY PLAYED "JUMP AROUND" AT THE THREE-QUARTERS MARK OF THE GRADUATION CEREMONY THIS PAST MAY.
Look, I'm not a stick in the mud. Graduation ceremonies are, generally speaking, tedious and dry events. If you want to lighten the place up a bit, I'm all for it. But this is the act of a group of delusional nutbags who fail to understand the rules of polite society.
(Aside: This was my third try for a video. The first two, from UW themselves and from our SB Nation "friends" at Bucky's 5th Quarter were marked "not available in my country," which I presume was for illegal copyright usage. This one's from Madison.com, and I suspect it makes it through because this qualifies as "news coverage," and thus is fair usage.)
(Aside, Part 2: Is it just me or is fun to see Camp Randall Stadium more than half empty?)
I can't even imagine what will happen tomorrow at the Bradley Center when the few Badgers fans in the building get a look at Rick Smith on the video board. Will they attempt a citizen's arrest for stealing what is rightfully theirs?